I’ve decided to kind of start a new series that I may blog on every now and then…and perhaps do a podcast too sometimes. It is basically just my thoughts on life and perhaps experiences that I have had in my life lately….. One big topic that sticks out in my mind is… Forgiveness…
Forgiveness can be quite hard. There’s times when it can be simple, but there are times when it can be complex….and even frustrating. But – in order to move forward – it is something that we need to do… or we find ourselves in limbo, continuously looking back at the past…. instead of marching on…. Sometimes, without forgiveness – that door that has been put in front of us – will remain locked, until our heart can find forgiveness…and when we find forgiveness- we can heal.
To some of my close friends, it is no secret that I’ve had some serious events that have required forgiveness in my life… I might have not completely forgotten about those situations – but I have and (am working on) forgiveness. The reason I say I have – because there is one event in my life that went on for over a decade… Just recently, have I learned to forgive this person…. There’s still some hurt there, but I have found, that the more that I hold onto anger… the harder it is to heal…. I need to forgive, so that I can heal as a person.
Within the past year… I abruptly lost a friendship… I’ll never be sure what actually happened, since they shut the door and locked it…. I was never told why the friendship stopped….. It just… ended. And there are so many loose ends….and there was no closure. I still feel the hurt from this because of my confusion from the entire situation…. But I am learning to try to forgive this person – because perhaps there was something going on in this person’s life that I was unaware of…. But I only wish they would have told me their concerns…. instead of shutting the door on what I thought was a close friendship that I had invested so much of my time in….
Recently, another door was abruptly closed… again. (Maybe I should start looking in new places to find friends?) There were so many misunderstandings from them, that assumptions were made…. and all of their assumptions were untrue. This friendship was over the course over a year. Much shorter than the one I stated above (which was about 5 years)…. This person said a lot of mean angry things to me and about me…. It broke my heart. I also revealed a lot of personal things to this individual…. They made me feel like I could trust them… I had thought there was a connection…. This is a two – week wound that I am trying to close…and trying so hard to forgive. But I did tell this person – that I would pray for them… (and I have).
….I think perhaps once the hurt that has entered my heart has subsided, I can completely forgive these recent trials in my life… But the pain is new. And it is stubborn. But with forgiveness, I think I’ll be able to completely move on – and see both of these situations as lessons. – I did say – that forgiveness isn’t easy.… But I am working on it…
Because – the father of all…. Our creator – He forgives us for the things we do…. so – why shouldn’t we do the same?
Catch my 10 minute podcast show on “Forgiveness” by clicking on the link below: