We all have heard of Foreshadowing in literature….We all want that happy ending like in fairy tales…But does any of this apply to real life? Is there Foreshadowing in our lives? Are we being warned before we enter that darkness? Before trauma crosses our path?

We all have a story…a background from which we come from…Some of our stories are more black and white while others are splashes of color….and then, there are those that are desolate and cold….

I often wonder if the dark pigments of my childhood was a way to Foreshadow hardships that I would later face as an adult….? Was this a warning that I should have paid attention to…? Or was it basic training for the war that I would face later in life ? Was God preparing me for a fight I would later encounter? Or did I unconsciously pick a situation that only I had grown accustomed to?

For those of us who have had dark moments in our lives; when we were exposed to shouting and domestic disturbances in our younger years- we seem to find ourselves fighting similar battles that we once had been exposed to. Did we unconsciously choose to be in that situation because it was what we knew?

I keep searching for the why’s…Why did I face so many battles? Were there clues that I could not see? Had there been bread crumbs along the trail that I did not pick up? Or was I just a soldier in this game we call life ? A soldier who would later become a messenger to tell others of redemption and light?

After all, I’m still here…even if I did miss the hints of Foreshadowing. I can look God in the eye and say to him, ” We’re still here.”

….If you have faced the darkness and you feel there were moments of Foreshadowing you missed, don’t despair…You might have been a soldier in your wars, but now- you can deliver your story…Show others redemption- a story of light and love…

Maybe after awhile, you can finally stop asking, “Why?” …and you can ask “Who?” and “Where?” ….Who will you share your story with ? Where will you deliver your light? Foreshadow of what’s to come.

After all, we’re still here. So rise.

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FORESHADOWING IN LIFE?

Foreshadow-
A warning…or indication of a future event.
Throughout our lives, events take place.

We question their timing…
The why’s…
…and when…
So many questions
Lead to impossible conundrums and
We look for clues.

Were we warned?
Did our divine father
leave simple hints?
Or were we blind to a truth that we didn’t want to see?

Does our life contain foreshadowing
For our mind to perceive…?
Or for perhaps our searching hearts, to feel?

Is our road life mapped out, with foreshadowing planned-
So we can see the construction up ahead?

….Can destiny be twisted ?
Or do we ultimately have faith, to let go of the reigns
From time to time?
Will we see the bumps on
this trail of life?

There are trials that
invade our safe spaces
and revelations that come to dawn…
yet, we move forward,
sometimes too quickly –
or not quick enough.

…We seek truth…
But, will the wisdom escape,
from the tip of our silent tongue,
as we await to be carried…
or do we seek the ultimate truth that is stored in the depths of
our heart strings…

– Ariana R Cherry 2018

microphone-2618102_960_720

I have been doing a podcast, “Night Moves Radio,” since August of 2017. Naturally, I am always checking out podcast apps on Google Play to see what is new or perhaps would could help the network that we currently podcast on (The R.I.F.T.) .

Yesterday, I came across, “ANCHOR.” It is a simple podcasting tool that allows you to create short podcast episodes. You can create them on your own, invite a friend or even talk to a complete stranger about a topic. It is almost like taking podcasting and turning it into a social platform.

Yesterday, I create a short 7 minute podcast and also spoke with a stranger about creativity. The links to my profile and podcast are below. Hopefully, you will listen and enjoy what I have created so far. I plan to do more.

_____________________

Click on the inks below to check out my profile on Anchor or listen to my episodes

https://anchor.fm/ariana-r-cherry-poet–artist/embed

https://anchor.fm/ariana-r-cherry-poet–artist/embed/episodes/The-Importance-of-Our-Stories-e1arpr

https://anchor.fm/ariana-r-cherry-poet–artist/embed/episodes/A-Conversation-about-Creativity-e1akm2

” A journey from dark to light…Don’t be afraid of the darkness…Light will not fail us even when the stars have gone to sleep.’
***************

Midnight Days
—-
On those midnight days,
I can’t feel safe in my
own shaken skin…
All those haunting dark memories arrive once again, rushing in…

My aching and frightened
heart shutters…
And The well sadly overflows…

All the Earth shattering emotions
Wake up the darkness that
Had been hiding far beyond my
Locked door in the secret forest
Which I had built so many
Years ago.

…I’d pushed those memories
away once
And salvaged the pieces that
Were broken…

But on those midnight days…
Sometimes all it takes is a
minute jolt…
An echo from the past…
….they can create madness in me
In just a few seconds flat.
I am no longer my own.

….there are days, my
Apprehensive mind is at war…
And there’s nothing but love’s light
That I beg for…

Humbly I kneel,
As I play the game of this
soldier’s mind war.
…emotions gripping me with their fine tipped sword,
Piercing my determined heart…
With love’s grace, I battle,
refusing to fall apart…

I won’t let them give me
Anymore midnight days…
…and unbearable pain
that flickers throughout
The costume of my skin…

I’m just a soul.
Just a soul inside…
…fighting for love’s pure grace…

Take away, my midnight days.

– Ariana R Cherry
2018

I’m only taking a half step back today…not a full step back…

Some days I feel like I’m doing really well and then there’s days I’m faced with a trigger and it really messes with my mindset for the rest of the day…or even the next few days. I can ignore the issue for awhile, but it comes right back, waving it’s hand in my face…

I hate PTSD.

It makes me doubt myself.

I over analyze.

I’m on the verge of tears…

Because of one small thing…

One trigger…

And I get so angry with myself.

…It’s been almost four years! …Things from the past still haunt me. Sometimes I feel like I’ll never be normal or be able to handle the emotions in my mind…

Today, someone got really angry with me. I tried to be strong. But they kept pushing…and pushing. And I apologized. And apologized…but I kept feeling more like nothing. Like I wasn’t good enough…I was small all over again….it was like he was yelling at me again…..and then the tears started….and started to fall. and I tried so hard to not let them fall…but they did. Once again-I was weak…

And then a little later, I got angry…When will I be strong enough to face criticism ? When will I be able to handle someone being angry with me in a proper way…instead of breaking down? I am sure there will be other times. This will not be the only time…I can’t cry and feel so pathetic and small every time something gets said…but, it feels exactly how he used to talk to me…Why doesn’t my mind know the difference?

When…will I ever feel normal again?

Half a step back. Just a half step.

…My mind can be a war zone, but I will not take a full step back in these combat boots. Just one half step back…and breathe.

Perhaps…there’s a poem to be written from this half defeat that will conquer this battle.

I hate PTSD.

And it hates me.

Uniinvited
Uninvited
 
Something mysterious…
almost haunting
lingers within…
 
Heavy atmosphere,
and unknown energies dance
around her soul’s outer-edges…
 
A force, tugs at her aching heart through each sunrise
and follows after the late afternoon sunset,
and then again, as the moon rises to the night sky
to join the band of astrological constellations and stars.
 
Something silently lingers.
For it is present…
with no name,
but a driven force, that grows closer each day…
 
She is not alone.
 
An invisible presence follows her every waking move…
The blowing seasonal wind quietly whispers her given name,
but with a quick glance…
there is no gentleman or dame.
 
Her beating frightened heart, fills with varied emotions,
and tugs heavy on her curious soul…
For someone is constantly seeking…
There is a persistent goal.
 
But why do they call her name?
 
For her daily footsteps are followed,
and recorded, etched in the invisible air…
and whispers echo, passing through the
long strands of her hair…
 
The uninvited, hover above…
as she surrounds herself in nothing but
an overwhelming bounty of love…
 
Uninvited guests they are…
Yet persistent – here they stay.
 
No definite answers come to mind.
Although her spirit is unsure of what there is to find.
Echoes of their historical past, arise every day,
 
She calmly bows her head…
sending forth her wondering questions
as she feverishly prays…
 
And in response,
The wind blows ever so sweetly,
dancing throughout the cool air…
 
But why do they call her by name?
 
***************************
 
Ariana R Cherry 2018

LightOverComes

LIGHT OVERCOMES

Bleak black darkness…
is said to be the absence of that precious light…
yet… it is also the absence of so much more –
Love.
Joy.
Warmth.
Even our own faith.

The light within is part of our eternal soul,
in which we love, and experience warmth and joy…

Faith is the light, that shines outward…
The light – that you see which shines within our eyes,
and radiates from our innocent heart.
It is the fuel that energizes our spirit.

Within this incredible journey, which we call life,
there are obstacles that block those intricate twists and turns.
Some of them are quite foreboding…
and then there are others – that are easy to trod.

And when a half moon sends a shadow,
blocking the twinkle of the brightest stars,
our spirit can tumble down a black hole,
that swallows our beating hearts,
making it difficult to breathe life…

For the light within, fades…. and steps stumble,
tripping on the daunting journey…
A clear path can be hard to see…
and that evil mysterious darkness – hides our precious key.

For we fight through the blinding fog,
and all the precious matter sends energy
rushing through our brittle bones,
Searching for warmth and trying to create hope –
One way, for our soul to thrive.
So the spirit fights to be free…and stay alive…

Light overcomes…
Love rules.
And love wins.

“The light shines in the darkness.
And the darkness has not overcome it.”

– Ariana R Cherry 2018